Disclaimer for those with a weak stomach, just keep scrolling and don’t read on.

For a quick recap

10/15 I had a hospital visit for what felt like a god damn baseball in my ass and I had turned into a human jiffy lube. I thought it was oil, much to my horror it was in fact god damn blood. Weight loss in a concerning amount, still having pain in weird places when eating.

11/3 I met with a GI specialist who ordered these scopes for 11/13 (cameras in every fucking orifice apparently🤡) and I got ballsy and decided I wanted to try out those “SuTab” prep pills.

11/12 Grave mistake. Not only did I pay a $50 copay, the pains that came from ingesting these pills was worse than the 72+ hours I was in active labor with my child. I screamed. It felt like I was being stabbed and a knife was being dragged all thru my colon. Like a tumbleweed of those 12 pills just nuked my insides to high heavens.

Whoever designed this has to have some serious fucking issues.

Can we also mention the concept that potassium chloride is what they use in fucking lethal injections but is also in these pills😳

Yes I did have to look up if that was the stuff in Lethal injections, it is. I know meds can have different uses but by Jesus we couldn’t have come up with ANY other option besides the one that causes inmates hearts to stop????

This one didn’t help my anxiety (I also got stuck on information about lethal injections for far too long, oops).

24 pills in such a short period of time is giving drug addict vibes, like we couldn’t have condensed that shit to like six pills? Design flaw for sure.

POST OP FOLLOW UP

11/15

Now cue the “she’s a crazy lady” comments. That double procedure gave me less answers than when I went in.

It’ll be 7-10 days until the biopsy results come back. In the meantime they know I don’t have celiac disease but I DO have erosive gastritis (when you look that up essentially stomach acid eats the lining of your stomach away, which tracks for someone who smoked for 20 years and lived off sketchy bodega $1 energy drinks😬)

I’m weaning myself off the Celsius energy drinks, I did start myself on an over the counter antacid and I do feel 100000000x better seeing that I don’t have any of the damage that I had been expecting to have from the celiac. I even managed to eat Cheerios last night without any issue!🥳

I don’t think I’ll ever get a single answer to why I was bleeding gallons of bloody oil or why it felt like my asshole was falling out of me.

I don’t think my doctors even care enough to find out if I’m being frank. The best I’ve been able to come up with is that my body was over the nicotine vapes, but who really knows.

I really need to stop caring about my health more than my providers do.

I survived off $0.25 bags of chips and intravenous opiates for years, if some pain while eating is gonna finish me off, so be it✌🏻I am definitely done with the colonoscopies though. I’m going back to “no fucks given” on this one because caring about this stuff has honestly made me feel worse. Counting calories and reading labels had me a neurotic mess.

Oh and the switch of narcotic meds given during these procedures is a load of horse shit. Years ago I got the fentanyl/versed combo or the ketamine twilight special for my years on MAT. But noo- that place gave me that horrific propofol nonsense that was god awful🤢

I couldn’t sleep that one off fast enough, that medication made me instantly annoyed with everything and a total douchebag (more so than usual)

So ya, that will probably be the last time I let them shove cameras up me but at least there’s a chance I’ll be able to eat gluten again like a normal person once I heal the gastritis stuff🤞🏻

Here I was thinking my experience could give people answers and in the end it didn’t do that whatsoever… oops🤡